Saturday, January 23, 2010

"aar u fraam Indyaa madam??!"

There are lots of people who have asked me this question in the past few years.
Recent conversation between a cab driver and me:

Driver:"aar u fraam Indyaa madam??!"
D: Me aalso fraam Indya!!
M: Okay
D: U know Hindi?
M: No
D: English?
M: Yes
D: I Marathi fraam Mumbai. U?
M: Madras
D: Ohhhhh! Madarasiiii?!!
D: U warkinggg?
M: No, my husband is
D: Ohhhh!!! Kids?
M: No.
D: Oh firrst fiivee yearrs no kids, only husband wife no tension.
1 kid nooo tensionnn, 2 kid nooo tensionnn.
M: How many kids do you have?
D: Three! Fullll tensionnn!
M: Where is your wife?
D: Wife? In country. My wife veryyy verry heavy.
M: Oh, In India.
D: Yes yessss. Verryyy Heavvy and vveerryy sstrongg.
M: Hmm.
D: Not good veerryyy heeavyyyy.
M: …
D: New married?
M: Yes
D: New no tension, Husband come home all tension go.
Veryyyy happpyyy.
Nooo slleepinnn in nighhts. Only workkiinng harrd.
You sleepinng nights???
M: Um yes.
D: Verryy baddd. Now no sleepping. Only workingggg.
Thankfully I reached my destination before the conversation could go any further.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Mars & Venus...

A few years back I used to read books like ‘Men are from Mars & Women are from Venus’, ‘Why Men Don’t Listen and Women Can’t Read Maps’ etc, elaborating on the basic differences between the sexes.

Now it looks like it is time to actually live through all of that!

Am sure there are many people out there who have realised that men turn deaf while watching TV.On the other hand I remember the hours I have been chit-chatting over the phone or even in person while still following something on TV!

Also what is this constant obsession with Ten Sports, ESPN and any other Sports channels on air?!? I am constantly watching players running around one field/ground/court or the other and always hearing running commentaries, cheers and the constant hum of the crowds, all of which peak when someone kicks a goal, hits a four or misses a shot.
And if it’s not from the broadcasts it’s from the Playstation :-(
This forms the background of my cooking, reading, eating, browsing, sleeping and all other general activities of the day!
Oh no, am wrong. Not always.

Suddenly I hear a hard, raspy voice screaming something unintelligble, a serious of dull thuds and some booming music.

Do you smell what the Rock is cookin?!?

WWE is beyond me.
Just can’t imagine why on earth anyone would want to see one mountain of rippling flesh pummell another mass of meat.

But now its time for a happy thought.

Today is grocery shopping day. Yippeee!

Though I suppose Mars’ and Venus’ feelings on this is totally reversed.
Men just go, pick up a handfull of items that are in the list, check out and exit. That’s it.

I could easily spend about a couple of hours in a supermarket,
walking up and down the various aisles(though I do get myself lost half the time ;-)), looking at what is available on the shelves even if it’s the same stuff that was there last week,ticking off the things on my list and picking up a few that were not on it, roaming around once more to see if anything catches my eye (or anyone for that matter! Hehe!).

And if this is the way I shop for weekly supplies you can just imagine how I would shop for clothes!

I hear that most of my friends’ husbands dare not accompany them for shopping.
Or actually its vice versa.
Most of my friends dump their husbands,take their credit cards and go shopping ;-)

A plan I intend to follow from today!

Off I go,
On my way,
All aglow,
It's Shopping day!!

Ta Da!!!!!


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