I know a lot of people who are career-oriented and ambitious. But unfortunately, due to some weird wiring of my system I don’t fall under that category. So here I am – The Domestic Diva.
I do appreciate the fact that you all out there are busy saving the world from the aliens or educating today’s brats to be responsible citizens of tomorrow or playing dice with stocks and shares or simply writing software for the next model of the mobile phone that I am using now or even pretending to work and reading my blog (Ha! Caught you!). But on behalf of all the domestic Goddesses out there, I would like to state here that we have our own share of dilemmas too! Cynical? Well wipe that superior smirk off your face and read on mon ami(e):
Dilemma No. 4: Which idiot designs the cobblestone pavement encircling the supermarket to be sloping?!?!?! For those of you who know me, I am a poor little petite lady. I find it almost impossible to manipulate a shopping cart loaded with about 2 weeks’ worth of groceries against the slant of the land. It is an uphill task (pun intended) all the way! I step out of the mall and hang on for dear life to my cart, lest it rolls away and bangs into a car or worse on some unsuspecting soul. Recently I was pushing and prodding my way to the taxi stand without much success. A kindly Good Samaritan offered to help and helped me till the taxi. But while I was loading the stuff into the trunk of the taxi, the taxi driver blew his horn and turning, to my horror, I saw my cart rolling down the pavement. Dropped the bags in my hand and grabbed my cart. Thank goodness I was not holding onto the eggs basket! Sheesh!
Dilemma No.3: My nephew plays a game in Kindergarten called Wood, Paper, Scissors. Well I ask you- Wood, Plastic, Glass?? I am talking about chopping boards. Sometime back I was advised to use wooden chopping boards instead of plastic. But on a recent visit to a friend’s place, I saw him using a plastic one. He is in the catering industry and so what with him being the man in the business and all that, I posed this question to him. Isn’t a wooden chopping board better to use than a plastic one? Because if you notice on your plastic chopping boards (if you use one), there would be many grooves and cuts formed while chopping whatever it is that you chop. Which probably means that you add a few particles of the plastic too alongwith your chopped stuff, right?
Well turns out that all major hotels use plastic chopping boards-and what’s more they even have them colour coded-Green knives and green plastic boards for veggies, red ones for meat, blue ones for seafood, yellow ones for ready-to-eat things like cut-up fruits and so on. It seems that since wood has pores in its surface, juices/water from whatever we are chopping may seep in and the dampness would serve as an ideal ground for bacteria and germs to breed.
I am guessing that glass might be a good option-but then if you are endowed with butter-fingers like me, chances are you would break the glass AND prick yourself with the glass pieces too! Not safe! So finally I just decided to settle on wood anyway. I figured that with the high temperatures involved in the Indian style of cooking that I mostly do, all bacteria should be effectively destroyed. Better than eating plastic I presume.
Dilemma No.2: Can somebody please, please, please teach me how to use the can opener?!?!?! I have been trying to figure this out for the past couple of years all to no avail! (Shut up! I am NOT dumb!) Wahhhh!! Back in my childhood, we never had any can openers at home. I remember my mom holding a sharp knife vertically on the rim of the can, hitting it with a hammer and going around the whole circumference of the top of the can. If you lose your patience mid-way and try to pry the half-open lid-stop right there and don’t waste your energy. That approach hardly ever succeeds-you will probably end up with a bent lid, half the contents stuck within the can, not to mention scraping your finger on the serrated edges of the can. Trust me I have given blood all for a few yummy drops of Milkmaid. You got to go the whole damn way! Or they could just stop producing cans which need can openers and instead just manufacture the ones which can be opened by pulling at the hook on the top-like Coke or Beer cans…Sigh!
P.S: Hey BG, if you are reading this I remember that you had written something about this on your blog a long time back... But I couldn't find it now....
Dilemma No.1: This exalted position goes to the ubiquitous question “What to cook for the next meal?” There are innumerable cuisines around the world and a zillion dishes to make. I agree. I could cook that dish that I was thinking of trying out for some time now. Only I checked my pantry (or the fridge) and the one important ingredient for this particular dish is out of stock. Well okay…then let me cook this other dish-oh wait! Somebody (or the other) doesn’t eat this vegetable/meat. Fine then what about this one? Oh no! Not that! I just made that a few days back! Apart from all that, it should also be nutritious and healthy and tasty all at the same time, not too oily or cheesy, not too much of sodium, not too sweet, not too bland, should not require too much effort or money, should not be boring and repetitive, should be different but not too adventurous, should not contribute to the ever-increasing waistlines and love handles, should appeal to the eyes and nose as well etc etc etc!
Okay I hear you say, "Well these are common to both the working and the stay-at-home women!" But then the working woman can always say "Well I am too busy to worry about such trivialities! I have to think about stopping the sky from falling down and the earth from caving in!"
On the other hand, what lame excuses could we domestic divas give?!?
So there you go! Now don’t you agree that the life of a domestic diva is as bad as braving rush hour traffic, handling pesky customers, uncaring co-workers, irritating bosses, ever-shortening deadlines, impossible targets and uninspiring projects!?! All I can say is ….. You’d better ;-)
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