Wednesday Wishlist #7: A Prayer

Image Credit: criswatk

When I was a very small girl, due to some reason, I used to be plagued by nightmares almost every single night. As a solution to this, my parents told me to keep a rosary (prayer beads) below my pillow before I go to sleep. And surprisingly, after that my nightmares stopped (mostly). And even more strangely, on days when I would forget to place the rosary, I would again have nightmares. The pious might call this a miracle and the sceptical might not even believe me. But logically speaking, I think that by placing the rosary, I simply believed that the nightmares would go away – and therefore stopped dreaming them up. On the days that I missed, my guess is that my sub-conscious mind was still aware of the facts.

So this is my earliest memory of me ever praying for anything – although my parents tell me that when we went for the interview during school admissions, I promptly ran up to a statue of Mother Mary and prayed, and that is what convinced the nuns to give me a seat! In any case, I eventually stopped placing the rosary because of laziness and instead resorted to saying a small prayer before going to sleep, which involved, among other important things, that I shouldn’t get a nightmare. Slowly this grew into a habit. Usually, I mumble a sleepy prayer as soon as I wake up, a hurried one as I am leaving the house and a habitual one before I go to sleep.  Plus of course, if I need something desperately, on special occasions or I’m either upset or exuberant over something, I do pray.  And by praying, I don’t mean that I stand in front of pictures or statues of deities and chant anything. I just close my eyes for a minute and say my prayers, wherever I happen to be. That’s it.  

I wouldn’t call myself extremely religious. I do believe strongly in my God but for a person who has parents who never ever miss Sunday Mass and in-laws who have a whole legion of impressive churches attributed to them, I lag a lot! For one thing I don’t agree with everything that the Church teaches, including its stand on abortion, contraception and evangelisation. For example, I feel that Christianity is to an extent, if not altogether liberal, towards women. But what is this concept that a woman should cover her head in Church in order to show that she is governed by a man??! I choose to assume that instances such as these are simply miscommunications and distortions that have occurred, over the hundreds of years that this religion has been in existence.  

So I guess that whether I am a well-balanced religious person or not, I am certainly not dogmatic or fanatic about it. But there is no denying that it does provide me with comfort, hope and guidance. I recently came across a small prayer called the Serenity Prayer – and it has quickly become my favourite. The prayer is a short one but I think that the most profound lines of it are:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can,

And wisdom to know the difference. 

Isn't this a lovely prayer? What more could one ask for? It is said to be written by Reinhold Niebuhr in 1943. And the best thing about it is that it is a religion-independent prayer - which means anyone, irrespective of their religious beliefs, can say it when they feel that they need some peace in their lives. 

This simple prayer is also my wish for this Wednesday's Wishlist.

On Teacher's Day...

Image Source: www.sxc.hu

Teacher's Day was always celebrated with great enthusiasm and fan-fare back in school. No classes were held and we students put up plays or shows to entertain our teachers - for which we would have started rehearsing all by ourselves, weeks back! It was a day of fun for both the students and the teachers (hopefully they didn't get bored to death watching our shows!).

I think I got enamored by the field of English, Journalism/Writing simply because I had such fantastic English teachers. Although I was not a topper, generally my performance in studies used to be above-average. I was always interested in English as a subject, but from my 8th standard onwards, I found my ideas, essays and answers being well-appreciated by my English teachers. Seeing those stars and congratulatory stickers stuck on my answer sheets made me glow with happiness. And I guess that it was then that I started believing that I was actually good, if not great, at something.

I get so irritated when, on hearing that English was/is my favourite subject, some people remark, "Oh why because it was easy is it?!". Well, the answer is a big, fat NO. Firstly, in my school, we had quality English teachers - not people who simply made us learn everything by rote, but rather women who cared enough and were passionate enough to take the trouble to explain the intricacies of the language and who helped me realize, recognize and appreciate the beauty and depth of both prose and poetry. They took the time and effort to awaken a genuine interest in us. What can I say? They succeeded! I still remember my high-school English classes, poems and lessons we were taught, with fond memories and today I can confidently say that I have taken up Writing as a career, because of my awesome English teachers. To be more specific, two of the most loved English teachers were Ms.Nandini and Ms.Soans - I'm sure that no one who studied under them will ever forget them!

I was fortunate to be educated at one of the leading schools in Chennai. But there are so many young children who do not have access to basic education - thereby building their entire future on a rocky and unstable foundation. All teachers are always special for the role they play in shaping the dreams and ideals of future generations, but the teachers who reach out to such disadvantaged children, definitely deserve a special mention. This is a story of one such teacher - Mangal Madam, associated with an NGO called Colors. Head over to Women's Web to read my article on her here.

So who was your favourite teacher? What do you fondly recall about him/her? Please share with me! 

I Believed

When I was 5, I believed everything.
People said I was just innocent.

When I was 10, I believed my parents,
People said I was just young.

When I was 15, I believed my friends,
People said I was just inexperienced.

When I was 20, I believed in Love,
People said I was just naive.

Now I just believe in myself,
And I no longer care, what people say.
                               - Anne John

Image Courtesy: Dreamstime 

If Only Life Had A Rewind Button

Have you ever felt that way? I have. Lots of times! I know that there are a blessed few who live with absolutely no regrets. Then there are others who fool themselves into thinking that they have no regrets. Unfortunately, I don’t fall into either of the two above mentioned categories. I accept that in my moderately short life so far, I do have a handful of instances which, if given a chance, I would like to change.

Does this sound interesting? Head over to Janhvi's Thoughtful Thoughts to read my guest post over there! Have fun!

Image Courtesy: Dreamstime

Haaaave you met Elvis?

No not him.













I’m not really a pet person. Thus far I have owned only 2 pets in my lifetime. The first being a lost parrot, which landed up tired at our doorstep, when I was very small. So my mom took it in and we looked after it for some time. The only thing I recollect about this parrot was that (1) It used to eat guavas and spit out EVERY single seed everywhere! (2) We never used to cage it and it was used to roaming around freely in the house. One day it was missing and the maid found it electrocuted below the refrigerator, where apparently it had been pecking on the wires. Tragic. But frankly, I was too young to really remember much.

The next pet or should I say pets, that we owned were fishes. Nothing fancy; just a small and simple aquarium with a couple of aquatic plants, a few smooth pebbles scattered around for aesthetic purposes and a small number of common aquarium fishes. My brother and I were supposed to take turns to clean the tank but since both of us were/are pretty lazy gooses, many a time, the poor fishes must have cursed us to damnation for letting them swim around in dirty water. Fed up with our negligence, our parents often threatened to give the fishes away. The final straw was this incident.

It had been exam-time, and so neither of my brother nor I, were going to spare any time for fish-tank-cleaning activities. By the time the exams were over and I had gotten over my laziness, the water was so extremely sinister looking and foul smelling that the Loch Ness monster would have loved it; I finally took pity on the fishes. I managed to transfer all the fishes into another container, except one. This one was quite a big fish with long whiskers and was well known to thrash about a lot when caught in the net. So you will empathize with me when I say that I was pretty nervous. I had emptied half of the murky water with weeks of fish crap, slimy moss and other such god-awful things into a bucket and then decided to take a break to contemplate my next course of action. I sat, rested my leg on this bucket and was trying to bring up my courage to catch the whiskered terror. So deep in contemplation was I, that involuntarily, I kicked over the bucket. In an instant, our entire living room was flooded with water that must surely have had alarmingly high toxic levels. Call it crazy coincidence, but it was precisely at that moment, that we had a neighbour drop in with another visitor! God knows what they must have thought! Needless to say, the rest of the day was spent cleaning the house, by pouring bucket after bucket of water and emptying a bottle of strong detergent. That marked the end of our tryst with pet fishes.

Neither have I had much luck with dogs. Although I never owned one, some of my friends have. One day, while I was visiting somebody, for some strange reason their dog started chasing me. I ran for dear life and that must have probably made the dog more determined to get a hold of me. At the spur of the moment, I had this brilliant(!) idea that it won’t follow be up the stairs and so made a dash for the terrace. But surprise! It bounded right after me up the stairs and had me cornered and cowering at the very end of the terrace’s parapet wall. Thankfully, by this time, hearing my strangulated cries, the dog’s owner came up and led him away. I am sure that if the dog had taken even one more step towards me, I would have blindly jumped off the terrace!

So this being the state of things, I don’t think I am ready to have pets. Pets require too much attention and care and I am just not ready to take on that kind of responsibility. Plus they die. I mean come on! You put in so much effort and time and energy and money and love and care and what-not - and in the end they go and die on you. Not fair. It is enough that the people I love will end up dying some day, let alone the animals too.

Now let’s come to the star of this post. Elvis.


The sweet little African Grey Parrot at a friend’s place. I have indeed heard so much about talking parrots but I’ve never really come across one. But boy! Can Elvis talk! If he knows you reasonably well, he will imitate you to perfection. The other day, I was in one room and I thought that Elvis and my friend were having a conversation. It was only after a while that I realized that my friend wasn't there at all - Elvis was talking so exactly like my friend that I was simply amazed. But the most charming thing about him? He happily whistles an old Hindi number and once done he congratulates himself saying “Bravo, Elvis Bravo!” in his parroty voice! Now if that’s not cute, I dunno what is!

I’ve only met Elvis a couple of times and both of us are pretty scared of each other. (Don’t you smirk! He’s got really sharp claws and an even sharper beak.) But I must say that he is a real darling! His grey plumage with a red tail doesn't make him as pretty as the other green or multi-coloured parrots, but the African Grey is said to possess intelligence nearly equivalent to that of chimps, dolphins and even human toddlers.And they have quite a long lifespan too! Oh btw, Ajay does a really comical imitation of how Elvis walks - those of you who know him, please ask him to show it to you when you meet him next! It is hilarious and I can’t stop laughing when I think about it!

I do have a vague dream though. Sometime in the distant future, say in 10 or 15 years, when hopefully I am wiser and reasonably mature, I am woken up in the middle of the night on by birthday. I am given a small box and there is something moving inside it. While I am nervously wondering what it can possibly be, out pops a tiny, little dachshund puppy. (I know dachshunds are kinda weird looking but I think that is why I like them. They look so silly!) He has a shiny, black coat with coffee-coloured paws and a coffee-coloured eyepatch over one eye - making him look like an adorable dog-pirate. He wags his stubby tail and looks at me with melting chocolate brown eyes. I gather him up in my arms and look gratefully at my husband. Doesn't it sound straight out of a movie? Well that’s how I am, but honestly, isn’t that a pretty picture?! (I know secretly you agree!)

Okay forget my cheesiness and check out this celebrity African Grey - Einstein! Have fun!

Image Courtesy: Sebastien Ravinet

TGIF #2: Good Samaritans

We were going to this mall the other day and while walking towards the Metro, I was stopped by a lady tourist, who was going to the same mall. She had no clue as to which train to take and seeing the cool, confident and suave me (Ahem! Ahem!), she approached me for guidance. I told her that we were also going to the same place and she gladly tagged along.

Firstly thank God she was going to the same place that we were. I am pathetic at giving directions. Once I was walking to my school and a car slowed down by me to ask directions to go to another school which was just next to mine. I couldn’t explain although I knew the place but I was eager to help. My parents had repeatedly warned me to beware of strangers and I was wary of getting into the car with the driver. So I confidently told him that I was also going to the same place and he could follow me! I don’t know what the driver thought, but the poor fellow did follow me in his car for the next couple of blocks at a snail’s pace!

So Kirsten, this lady I was talking about, is a South African Animation Specialist - pretty chatty and has a beautiful smile where her eyes crinkle up when she grins! When I told her that we were from India, she asked me which part and informed us that she had visited Mumbai and Delhi! The train was crowded and we had no place to sit. All three of us stood and gaily yapped away about this and that - well, actually she did most of the talking. She had come to Dubai on a last minute trip for her “baby sis’s” wedding! Arranged marriages, the Caste system, Astrology , Work, How I met My Husband were just some of the topics discussed in the short span of 30 minutes!

When we arrived at the mall, she was met by her (South African?)friend who on hearing that we were Indians, promptly greeted us with “aap kaisa hai?”. When I said that I was from South India, he then said “vanakkam!” Pretty charming, is it not!? Anyway then they went on their path and we went on ours.

We were running a little late for the movie that we had planned to catch and we had to drop into the library too. So my husband and I split up, with me choosing to go to the library and he to buy the movie tickets. We didn’t actually decide where we would meet up, as I thought that we could call each other, once our respective jobs were done. So I happily finished my books browsing and when I whipped out my phone to call, it was dead. I had charged it the whole day but I’ve been having a few problems with it lately and apparently one such problem was that the battery wouldn’t last for more than a couple of hours.

I went to the theater (or cinema if you will!) hoping to catch my husband there but he was nowhere in sight. I stood around wondering what to do (whatever happened to PCO booths?!). I then spied two Keralite Muslim women accompanied by a man strolling around. So I approached them and explaining myself, requested to use their phone to call my husband. I guess they were initially taken aback but they obliged. I made a quick call and let my husband know where I was and we were happily reunited in a few minutes.

I know that my no means were we in any kind of disastrous situation. If this kind stranger had not lent me his phone, maybe someone else might have. Or my husband and I would have been running around for a couple of hours trying to locate each other. (But by this point, my heels were already killing me. How on earth do people manage walking in high heels, let alone dance in them?!). Or eventually, I could have just hailed a cab and come home, hoping that my husband might do the same.

But we would have most definitely missed our movie, wasted a lot of time and energy and probably cursed each other. In short our day would have been spoiled. But instead, because of that good Samaritan, we had a pleasant time together. I’d like to think that my small little good deed earlier in the day earned me some good karma. As they say, what goes around comes around , eh?!

So today I thank all the good Samaritans out there, who have helped me in any way, big or small. (BTW does everyone know the history behind the phrase "Good Samaritan"?) I remember, when I was a kid, I used to go to a creche after school. Having too many kids around me was too great a temptation and instead of having my afternoon nap, I used to happily play with all the other kids. This resulted in my nodding off, sitting on the backseat of my dad’s scooter when he picked me up and took me home. If not for the numerous passersby who alerted my dad time and time again, “Paapa thoonguthu!” meaning “Baby is sleeping!”, I would have probably, slept and fell off the bike and seriously hurt myself.

There must be loads of people whom I have asked directions to go somewhere. The many people who have helped me lug my luggage through the many airports, when I teeter around with bag, baggage, coat, passport, ticket, book et al. And the people who have helped me shove my usually-heavily-over-loaded-bursting-at-the-seams hand luggage to the overhead compartments, without dropping it on the heads of the poor unsuspecting passengers seated below. These people were neither my friends nor family, or even acquaintances I vaguely knew. They were strangers. It wasn’t their job to help me. But they did. I would have probably managed to survive without their help. But the truth is however inconsequential their help seemed to be, it made my life slightly more tolerable; a tad bit easier. It made this world, a little brighter and a little better.

My thanks to all those good Samaritans out there! May I too find it in me to pass on all the good deeds that I receive!

Image Courtesy: www.dreamstime.com

Wednesday Wishlist #1: Cookbooks

I am a bookworm. Of all my hobbies if I have to choose only one, then it would be reading. I read almost anything and everything. When I had to live alone for months together without TV or Internet, one of the main reasons I survived without going mad was books.

I actually started reading quite by accident. My brother is also an avid book reader and being 6 years elder to me, he used to read/still reads a lot of books. At around 7 or 8 years of age, having a lot of idle time to kill, I started looking through the pictures of the comics that he had. It was a Little Archie book and I was so engrossed in looking at the pictures that my dad thought that I was reading earnestly and said something on the lines of “Good! You have also started reading. That is a good habit!” Having been thus (falsely) appreciated, I was too embarrassed to admit that I was only picture-gazing (Cmon! I was only a small kid!). But I felt a little guilty and so thought that I might as well read the book (See? I was a good kid.). And thus started my reading odyssey and from then on there was no turning back (the pages), so as to speak! Aside my school library, the first library I was a member of was Rajeshwari Lending Library on Kutcheri Road, Chennai. Later on I joined the Eashwari Lending Library in Gopalapuram – a small hole in the wall place, which has grown into quite a large franchise now! Every Saturday used to be ‘Library Visit Day’ and was eagerly looked forward to. If for some reason the trip got cancelled, I used to be terribly upset.

Starting with comics like Archies, Tinkle, Phantom - The Ghost Who Walks, Mandrake - The Magician, Spiderman, Superman , He-Man (you must understand that my reading choices were greatly influenced by my bro!), Casper - The Friendly Ghost, Richie Rich - The Poor Little Rich Boy, Jataka Tales, Panchatantra I think the first novels I ever read were by the quintessential kids’ favourite author Enid Blyton. (For a long time, for no apparent reason, I always imagined Enid Blyton as a guy.)

So then, after devouring all the Famous Fives, Adventurous Four, Secret Seven and even the Faraway Tree series among others, also boarding school stories like St.Clare’s and Mallory Towers, I went onto adolescent detective series like Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, Perry Mason, Agatha Christie and The Three Investigators. In between I also read loads of other stuff like Sweet Valley and a Tom-Sawyerish-series whose protagonist was called William, although I can’t remember the author. Then I grew up a little and started on Sidney Sheldons (and for a long time I thought Sidney Sheldon was a lady), Jeffry Archers, John Grishams, Erich Segals, Robert Ludlums, Ken Follet and Stephen King. Later my tastes diversified and now I read a whole variety of authors including J.K.Rowling, Paulo Coelho, Mario Puzo, Ayn Rand and the list goes on - much too long to list everyone here plus I'm sure to miss out on many! Also there were a lot of classics and miscellaneous books thrown in like The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Gone With The Wind, Diary of Anne Frank, Oliver Twist, David Copperfield and such fare along with all the non-details books at school such as Heidi and The Scarlet Pimpernel. Lately I’ve been trying to read more Indian women authors like Anita Nair, Janhavi Acharekar, Rupa Bajwa, Anita Jain not to mention a whole lot of time-pass magazines. I must say here though, that my brother’s and my tastes have grown quite apart over the years. Being the hot-shot banker that he is, he reads lots of boring (to me) finance, banking, and business related books.(I know you are reading this ;-)) On the other hand, my husband is also an ardent reader, but he refuses to read any non-fiction books. (You STILL haven't read the very first book I gave you! Hmph!!)

So coming to the point of this post. I had spoken about my love for cooking shows here. But for all my ramblings on how much I love books and cooking, I happen to own just a single cookbook, 'Cakes & Bakes', which I had picked up at some book fair. Much before I even started cooking, I had created a scrapbook of sorts, noting down recipes that I would like to try out alongside some drool-worthy pictures that I cut out from newspapers or magazines. Unfortunately, after I actually started cooking, I could not find that scrapbook :-(

After regularly blowing away a huge chunk of money on buying books, the husband and I decided to go frugal and enrolled at the Public Library here. So on every trip I make sure to pick up an interesting cookbook. One such book, I picked up was Anjum's New Indian, by the BBC celebrity chef Anjum Anand. I have not seen any of her shows so I wasn't sure about trying out her recipes but I did anyway. I must say that all turned out to be yummy! Although I did increase the heat quotient significantly as her chilli quantities seemed rather tame-more suited for the "firang" tongue! The book is organised into sections for Light Meals & Snacks, Seafood, Chicken, Meat, Vegetables, Beans & Lentils , Rice & Bread, Raitas a& Chutneys and Desserts. So far I've only tried out some chicken recipes (Sorry NS!) including Punjabi Chicken Curry, Black Maharashtrian Style Chicken, The Raj's Chicken Cutlet, Punjabi Chicken Curry, Goan Chicken and Potato Stew and Chicken with Pickling Spices but I soon intend to try out a few dishes from the other categories too.

Even with all the lovely cooking blogs that one can find at the touch of a button these days, I still enjoy cookbooks. I really like going through the list of ingredients and ticking them off in my mind and comparing the processes involved. But most of all - here I touch base with some primal, subconscious urge - I absolutely adore gawking at the pictures! And if they come accompanied with interesting stories or anecdotes, what's not to like!? Beautifully illustrated cookbooks are such a joy to behold!

And therefore, this Wednesday's Wishlist Item is Cookbooks!

Yip, Yap & Yippity Yap!

I was reading an old blog post of an old friend of mine here. And I couldn't stop myself nodding to her words (Although the main subject of her post is something else - which I intend to blog about in a separate post.) She mentioned that she is bad in the art of small talk. Same here. I simply suck at small talk. Don’t get me wrong - by no means am I a silent person; although I may seem so at first, once I get to know someone really well, nothing can keep me from yapping away. Ask my husband or my close friends-they probably have a part of their ear missing by now ;-) I have spoken for hours together over the phone, much to the irritation of my parents. My friends and I have chatted away into the wee hours of the night not even realizing the time. When I was small, my only worry when my parents came to school was that my teachers would complain that I was too talkative. In fact, that was indeed the only complaint against me for a long time.(Oh that and my math skills-but that’s a story for another day.) Many a time my poor mother, at her wits end has snapped “Can you just keep quiet for some time?” My husband on the other hand, just gives me an exasperated look and listens. Well, mostly.

Anyway the point is I have a lot to say. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here blogging would I? But small talk? Uh-huh. I honestly envy people who seemingly, can carry on conversations with others whom they met barely a few minutes back – about everything and anything. Many people have told me, that they often see me smiling. The simple reason behind that is – I have no idea what else to do. I answer whatever I am asked and I might even throw back the same question with “and u?” and nod my head at the answer. Beyond that I am clueless. On countless occasions I have racked my brains to say something interesting. Or just plain something. But no - my mind stubbornly resists and turns up it's nose at me. In fact, I think I have hardly ever initiated a conversation with anyone; it is generally the other person who starts first. I am usually comfortably lost in my own thoughts.

In earlier days young women used to be instructed in the art of small talk as it was considered to be a beneficial social grace to possess. Hostesses who could entertain their guests with their small talk were greatly admired. Hmm... Looks like I need to find out some such course and get myself enrolled in one ASAP.

P.S: I shall hold a seat for you too Neeru ;-)

Image Courtesy: www.dreamstime.com

Mind Your Manners Please!

I would say that good manners and etiquette often varies from place to place and culture to culture. For example, while I was working in the US, the Americans whom I worked with always used to pop this question “How are you?” almost every time they saw me-even if we happened to cross paths 4 or 5 times a day. It took me a while to realize that it is a rhetoric question and more like saying “Hi!” than anything else. No one really expects you to tell how them how exactly you are feeling. To be honest, I found it a little phony. I mean why can’t we just stick to a simple “Hello”? I’m sure people in India would give one a weird look if one kept posing this question every single time you met.

In India if anyone walks into someone’s home with their footwear on, its sure to create a hullabaloo - on the other hand, in most foreign countries I’m sure people would raise eyebrows if you padded barefoot into their homes.

Also we Indians are much more inquisitive about everybody’s lives. We want to know everything about him, her, their aunt and their distant cousins all included. Often I’ve been subjected to relentless grilling about my life on many a flight by many an aunty or granny! But then shouldn’t there be a line somewhere? There are some manners which are universal-such as saying “Thanks” and “Please”. Similarly there are some questions which you just can’t, or rather shouldn't ask. Of late, I’ve realized that many people are either simply unaware that it is not good manners to ask certain questions or are just not bothered about the inappropriateness of their questioning. So unless you are in a position where we BOTH think of each other as really (and I mean REALLY) good friends or a close family member, kindly refrain from asking these questions - and even if you do fall into the above category, please exercise some restraint!

1.“So when are you getting married?”: Thankfully I’m past this question. But until a couple of years back, it really used to irritate me. I pity the people who are still subjected to this one. Maybe everyone needs to follow the idea of this popular joke?

When I was young I didn't like going to weddings. My grandmother would tell me, "You're next" However, she stopped doing that after I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.

2.“So any good news?”: Now that I have successfully overcome the above obstacle, it’s time for the next question! Good news…. Hmm well lets c… I’m alive, I have a comfortable home and generous husband and loving family and a job I love doing. Isn’t that enough good news?! Any other “good news” is completely the personal business of mine and my husband-I don’t see why we need to keep you informed! So please just stop asking-before things start getting really ugly!!! You have been warned. (Yes YOU!)

3.“So how much do you earn?”: Yikes! I still remember once when I was a small kid, I was at my mother’s office simply running around and doing what kids generally do. One of my mom’s young colleague used to be friendly with me. One day for some reason, I asked him “So how much is your salary?” He gave me a look and asked me “Didn’t anyone teach you that it is bad manners to ask such a thing?” I was so ashamed. In case no one ever taught YOU that it is bad manners to ask people how much they earn, I am putting it down here. Now you know. So unless you are from the Income Tax dept or a potential employer willing to pay me atleast three times of what I earn now - please do not ask me this question ever again!!

Image Courtesy: Dreamstime

Dilemmas Of A Domestic Diva

I know a lot of people who are career-oriented and ambitious. But unfortunately, due to some weird wiring of my system I don’t fall under that category. So here I am – The Domestic Diva.

I do appreciate the fact that you all out there are busy saving the world from the aliens or educating today’s brats to be responsible citizens of tomorrow or playing dice with stocks and shares or simply writing software for the next model of the mobile phone that I am using now or even pretending to work and reading my blog (Ha! Caught you!). But on behalf of all the domestic Goddesses out there, I would like to state here that we have our own share of dilemmas too! Cynical? Well wipe that superior smirk off your face and read on mon ami(e):

Dilemma No. 4: Which idiot designs the cobblestone pavement encircling the supermarket to be sloping?!?!?! For those of you who know me, I am a poor little petite lady. I find it almost impossible to manipulate a shopping cart loaded with about 2 weeks’ worth of groceries against the slant of the land. It is an uphill task (pun intended) all the way! I step out of the mall and hang on for dear life to my cart, lest it rolls away and bangs into a car or worse on some unsuspecting soul. Recently I was pushing and prodding my way to the taxi stand without much success. A kindly Good Samaritan offered to help and helped me till the taxi. But while I was loading the stuff into the trunk of the taxi, the taxi driver blew his horn and turning, to my horror, I saw my cart rolling down the pavement. Dropped the bags in my hand and grabbed my cart. Thank goodness I was not holding onto the eggs basket! Sheesh!

Dilemma No.3: My nephew plays a game in Kindergarten called Wood, Paper, Scissors. Well I ask you- Wood, Plastic, Glass?? I am talking about chopping boards. Sometime back I was advised to use wooden chopping boards instead of plastic. But on a recent visit to a friend’s place, I saw him using a plastic one. He is in the catering industry and so what with him being the man in the business and all that, I posed this question to him. Isn’t a wooden chopping board better to use than a plastic one? Because if you notice on your plastic chopping boards (if you use one), there would be many grooves and cuts formed while chopping whatever it is that you chop. Which probably means that you add a few particles of the plastic too alongwith your chopped stuff, right?
Well turns out that all major hotels use plastic chopping boards-and what’s more they even have them colour coded-Green knives and green plastic boards for veggies, red ones for meat, blue ones for seafood, yellow ones for ready-to-eat things like cut-up fruits and so on. It seems that since wood has pores in its surface, juices/water from whatever we are chopping may seep in and the dampness would serve as an ideal ground for bacteria and germs to breed.
I am guessing that glass might be a good option-but then if you are endowed with butter-fingers like me, chances are you would break the glass AND prick yourself with the glass pieces too! Not safe! So finally I just decided to settle on wood anyway. I figured that with the high temperatures involved in the Indian style of cooking that I mostly do, all bacteria should be effectively destroyed. Better than eating plastic I presume.

Dilemma No.2: Can somebody please, please, please teach me how to use the can opener?!?!?! I have been trying to figure this out for the past couple of years all to no avail! (Shut up! I am NOT dumb!) Wahhhh!! Back in my childhood, we never had any can openers at home. I remember my mom holding a sharp knife vertically on the rim of the can, hitting it with a hammer and going around the whole circumference of the top of the can. If you lose your patience mid-way and try to pry the half-open lid-stop right there and don’t waste your energy. That approach hardly ever succeeds-you will probably end up with a bent lid, half the contents stuck within the can, not to mention scraping your finger on the serrated edges of the can. Trust me I have given blood all for a few yummy drops of Milkmaid. You got to go the whole damn way! Or they could just stop producing cans which need can openers and instead just manufacture the ones which can be opened by pulling at the hook on the top-like Coke or Beer cans…Sigh!

P.S: Hey BG, if you are reading this I remember that you had written something about this on your blog a long time back... But I couldn't find it now....

Dilemma No.1: This exalted position goes to the ubiquitous question “What to cook for the next meal?” There are innumerable cuisines around the world and a zillion dishes to make. I agree. I could cook that dish that I was thinking of trying out for some time now. Only I checked my pantry (or the fridge) and the one important ingredient for this particular dish is out of stock. Well okay…then let me cook this other dish-oh wait! Somebody (or the other) doesn’t eat this vegetable/meat. Fine then what about this one? Oh no! Not that! I just made that a few days back! Apart from all that, it should also be nutritious and healthy and tasty all at the same time, not too oily or cheesy, not too much of sodium, not too sweet, not too bland, should not require too much effort or money, should not be boring and repetitive, should be different but not too adventurous, should not contribute to the ever-increasing waistlines and love handles, should appeal to the eyes and nose as well etc etc etc!

Okay I hear you say, "Well these are common to both the working and the stay-at-home women!" But then the working woman can always say "Well I am too busy to worry about such trivialities! I have to think about stopping the sky from falling down and the earth from caving in!"
On the other hand, what lame excuses could we domestic divas give?!?

So there you go! Now don’t you agree that the life of a domestic diva is as bad as braving rush hour traffic, handling pesky customers, uncaring co-workers, irritating bosses, ever-shortening deadlines, impossible targets and uninspiring projects!?! All I can say is ….. You’d better ;-)

Image Courtesy: http://www.dreamstime.com/

Classified Info ;-)

Haaa Sundays! Sundays were always lazy days for me back home. Everyone used to get out of bed a little later than usual and are relaxed without the hustle and bustle of the weekdays. Since both my parents were working, the weekdays usually go in a blur and even Saturdays are busy days with some chores to do and errands to run.

So come Sunday, the house seemed lively with people, noises of Sunday programs like Aratai Arangam, Top 10 Movies, Swaptha Swarangal drifted in from the neighbours’ TVs , the vegetable vendors and fish vendors would come calling at the gate with their loud, hoarse voices and by noon the pressure cooker whistles, signaling that amma has made some tasty dishes for lunch and the whole house was filled with a mouth-watering aroma. I used to hover around the kitchen, waiting for amma to offer me a bite of this or that on the pretext of checking the salt ;-) Afternoons were filled by a siesta and evenings were spent at Church. Once night fell, there would be groans of “Oh tomorrow schooooll!” or “Office tomorrow!”

But after moving here, the whole spirit and tradition of Sundays has been sadly lost-because Sunday is a working day here :-( Boohoo! Also since I have to do the cooking, it is not as satisfying as eating amma’s food… My parents are planning to visit us next month and I am eagerly waiting for them! Am sure we will have a great time! Yeah!

Anyway coming to the point, I didn’t mean to write this post as an ode to Sundays. Actually with the Sunday edition of The Hindu newspaper, come a load of supplements, one of which is the classifieds paper.(Yeah and you thought I was going to share some secret with you ;-)) And of particular interest to me was the Matrimonial section. I always used to read it on the sly lest my parents thought that I was searching for a groom for myself. Nay that was definitely not my intention. Rather I always found the matrimonial ads interesting. Some were weird, some were snobbish, some were silly and some were outright funny! One common thread that was present in almost every ‘Bride Wanted’ ad was “Wanted slim, fair girl”! So what about chubby, dark-skinned girls??! India and its fair-skin-favouritism! I suspect that I became biased myself after reading countless such ads-no, not towards fairness but away from it! In fact, after my grandma met my husband for the first time, her first comment to me was “Payan konjam colour kammi…”, meaning “The boy is a little on the darker side…” Okay….So?!?!? Didn’t you notice anything else worthwhile for God’s sake!?!? If only you had opened your eyes, you could have seen that he is also tall and slim and healthy and that he has a great set of teeth and a charming smile!

So yesterday, I was flipping through some magazine when I landed on… you guessed it! classifieds again. Reading the ads there I honestly did not know whether to laugh or cry. Here are a few gems. I am typing them exactly as printed, with my comments in italics:

Wanted Bride:

Hello Girls! Are you searching for honest, sincere and trustworthy smart guy? (Well who isn’t? BTW one of your strengths is definitely not written english!) I am loving, caring and highly romantic guy 32 years searching for good-looking, slim and sincere girl for long-lasting relationship. My hobbies are music, watching movies, dancing, long drives, going to sea beaches (Um..Really would like to know if these”sea” beaches are different from “ocean” beaches?!) and hill stations. Girls willing for committed relationship reply with their details and photograph at: urluversa***@********

Okay firstly the email id sucks big time! And do you also like to do the laundry, wash the dishes, take the girl for shopping, cook, lend a listening ear to all that the girl talks even if they might at times be frivolous?! Because all the activities that you have listed seems to be for a “fun” relationship not a “sincere and committed “one!

Handsome teetotaller businessman desires an extremely beautiful, fair, slim, honest, affectionate, passionate, committed, elite, sophisticated and fashionable female, not interested in issues. (Whew! This person is living in la-la land!)

Handsome, tall young boy travelling worldwide like Kerala and western culture (!), romantic, sincere, caring seeks pretty girls for lifelong relationship or acting on movie/modeling (What is this? Orae kallula rendu maanga?!? Make up your mind dude! )

And this one from Situations Vacant:

Lonely businessman seeks unencumbered, clever lady assistant. Who can also assist in business. (“ A clever, unencumbered lady assistant for a lonely man who can also assist in business?!” So exactly what job is this ad for?!?)

Having said this I know that there are also many sincere advertisements placed in the classifieds. It is upto us to sift and sieve and separate the riff raff from the genuine ones. I really wonder, did any of these jerks above get what they advertised for?!?

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School is Cool!

How many of you remember your first day at school?
I do.
I kicked and cried and rolled around on the ground and made a big fuss to let go of my parents in that LKG classroom. The classroom had a wooden rocking horse on which every child wanted to ride and lots of colourful building blocks in all shapes and sizes.....
14 years later it was tough to let go. It was hard to say goodbye to a place which was almost like a second home. It was difficult to bid adieu to a wonderful place which had become a part and parcel of my life.

This year, my Alma Mater, Sacred Heart Mat Hr. Sec School, Church Park is celebrating its centenary year. It was founded a century ago by Nano Nagle in Ireland and is part of The Presentation Convent. 100 years of dedicated service in the field of education. I have long been thinking to write up something on my school and this seems to be a good time to start.

My school was a truly beautiful place in all aspects. It today’s world of tiny, cramped chock-a-block schools, Church Park enjoyed vast grounds at one of the prime locations in Chennai. Overall there were 4 schools inside- Sacred Heart English Medium, Sacred Heart Tamil Medium, St.Ursula’s and a Teacher’s Training school. A large basketball court, volleyball court, playground, kho-kho court, a small canteen, a pretty garden with a fish pond where you can feed biscuits to the fishes plus sprawling open spaces covered with shady trees to beat the heat. All the labs and library were pretty good and had good stock of everything that a school student would ever need. And there was a serene chapel inside too where you could go and pray in peace-except before exams when it used to get over crowded ;-)

But more than the facilities I think that what makes my school special is the countless good memories, fond remembrances, fun times and wonderful people that I shared all this with.
I still remember each and every teacher who taught me all the various lessons. Mrs.Mary Jacob(for some reason I don’t remember now I nicknamed her as pattani miss!), Mrs.Vasudev,Mrs.Morris,Mrs.Gnyanam,Mrs.Jeyaraj,Mrs.Raymonds, Mrs.Lakshmi,Mrs.Sunitha Thomas,Mrs.Christy Joseph,Mrs.Manjula Sampath,Mrs.Grace,Mrs.Sarla Thomas,Mrs.Susan Abraham,Ms. Nandini, Ms.Freda ,Ms.Fathima, Mrs.Shaguna, Mrs.Rajamanickam, Sister Prabha,Sister Anitha,Sister Lisetta and soooo onnnn!

From the beginning I was in the Shamrocks house-Green colour; always at loggerheads with the other houses-Lilies, Violets, Lotus and Rose. Sports day was when one’s team spirit came to the fore and it was a major gala event every year with games, athletics, performances-though I was never much into sports. Every year there used to be an art & crafts exhibition too…We used to prepare for that for months and months together. Also every class had turns to present the morning assembly and it was such fun to skip classes and go for practice sessions when it’s our turn! In fact our morning assembly sessions were one of the main inspirations for me to fall in love with the piano and take up keyboard lessons now. Piano music has always soothed and calmed me since then.

All the teachers were so kind and cheerful. Of course we definitely were shouted at ((but never beaten) with things like "Is this a fish market or classroom? Why are you girls making so much noise?" but all the teachers always had a “These-are-my-kids” attitude. There were so warm and genuinely cared for each of us. We were taught what it was to love, care and share with everyone around and I hardly ever came across anyone who was mean or narrow minded. My love for English was cultivated in this place. There were such interesting and interactive sessions.

Childhood is one of the best periods in an average person’s life. I thank God that he made mine and my friends even more beautiful with the gift of our school. It’s something which I recollect and fall back on whenever Life gets me down. And It’s enough to push me back on track ;-)